Am I In Any Way Responsible For My Childs Involvement?

The answer is simple - N0

Having read the previous chapter explaining the process of radicalisation.

We can tell you now that only a very small percentage of children and adults that we engage with, become involved in extremism due to their parents.

As you have seen there are many different reasons that a person will become involved. Identifying the reason is key to a successful outcome.

However it is our responsibility as parents on how we deal with our children’s involvement.

Unfortunately, many parents (including myself) don’t discover what exactly is going on until their child as already been involved for some time.

It’s common for parents to blame themselves for not noticing the signs and behaviours earlier, however what we must remember that many of these signs and behaviours can mimic many typical teenage traits.

Sadly, almost every parent that we engage with carries a sense of guilt and failure and feel that they are in some way responsible for their child’s involvement, however this is simply not true and holding onto these feelings will not be productive to your situation and will not help you or your child.

In fact, it will likely only cause more issues in your relationship, and whilst you are busy dissecting your life and your parenting wondering where you went wrong, extremists will be busy using your distance, fear, guilt and sadness against you, and replace it with promises of fake friendships, understanding and compassion and by doing so that will only encourage your child to become more reliant and dependant on them and not on you.

No one is the perfect parent. We can all look back and wish we could have done things different at times, however, there isn’t a parent out there that hasn’t felt the same at one point or another. That is life.

So don’t ever feel guilt or shame, this isn’t your fault. The fault lies with the organisations that used your child’s own vulnerabilities and emotions against them, and if you give the organisations that have done this to your child the power, you will only allow these people to take advantage of you too.

Sarah - Exit Hate Support

Mom of a Former Far-Right Activist