School support is vital

Sadly, we have all heard the stories that are becoming more frequent about children becoming radicalised and becoming involved in extremism.

We have watched news stories as some of these events have unfolded, we have felt sadness and sorrow about the tragic and unnecessary loss of life, and we have read newspaper articles that provide us with information of the legal proceedings that follow.

What we often don’t think, see or hear about is how those events impact the parents of the perpetrators.

Even if we do, some may think about them with judgment, possibly even blame and responsibility. But is that really the case?

As parents and families, we are educated on the many dangers that our children could potentially face, from bullying and substance abuse to harassment and exploitation.

However, the one thing that is seldom spoken about is the danger of radicalisation and extremism and how this impacts everyone, the victims of hate, those involved and their families.

Many times, when families have a loved one become radicalised, they fail to see the signs as more often than not they have not been educated to do so.

Those signs are not always as obvious as you think and many of them can often mimic many other behaviours.

Signs of radicalisation

●      Increased Secrecy

●      Increased Anger and Agitation.

●      Multiple or sudden new online identities

●      Sudden intolerance

●      New or scripted Speech.

●      Obsessive desire for change

It is only when they might display the more obvious and concerning changes that families may realise that something is seriously wrong.

Further signs of radicalisation

●      Viewing extremist content

●      Isolating themselves

●      Divisive language

●      Justifying violence

●      Interest in weapons.

●      Expressing extreme views and opinions.

As things have often been declining for some time, when you reach this point parents are often terrified, confused and feel like they have failed at the most important responsibility that they have ever had, and that is raising their child.

They may feel like they are responsible in some way, they may fear that others will think the same, and that alone can prevent them from speaking up and getting the help and support that they all desperately need.

They may also fear that if they do speak up, they will get their loved one or themselves into trouble.

Sadly, what many do not realise is that by staying silent they are putting their loved ones, themselves and others in harm's way.

The only way we can reduce extremism and protect the people we care about, and love is by recognising the dangers and effectively responding to them

If you recognise any of the signs above, it is crucial that you do not ignore them. These indicators suggest a deeper, underlying issue that needs immediate attention and investigation. Dismissing these signs or simply hoping they will go away is a dangerous approach. Experience shows that these kinds of concerns are unlikely to resolve themselves without intervention and will almost certainly escalate over time, posing an increasing risk.

It is vital that you do not dismiss or undermine these signs, nor should you attempt to bury your head in the sand. Such inaction will not only fail to resolve the problem but will actively put yourself, your family, or others at significant risk. Taking a proactive stance is essential for safety and well-being.

Instead of ignoring the issue, you must actively seek advice and support. There are multiple reputable sources available to help guide you through this difficult process and provide the necessary expertise and resources.

Please consider reaching out to one or more of the following organisations and professionals:

●      Act Early: A dedicated service providing guidance and support for those concerned about someone who may be vulnerable to radicalisation. They offer confidential advice and practical help and have a 24 hour hotline people can call.

●      Prevent: The government-led strategy aimed at stopping people from becoming terrorists or supporting terrorism. This programme works with various partners to safeguard individuals.

●      Exit Hate: Specialist organisation dedicated to helping individuals leave hate groups or extremist ideologies, offering bespoke support and mentoring to people involved who want to leave and families with a loved one involved.

●      Designated Safeguarding Lead (DSL): Within educational settings and many other organisations, these individuals are responsible for overseeing safeguarding arrangements and are trained to manage concerns.

●      Teachers and Educational Staff: Often key observers of changes in behaviour, school staff can provide vital insights and connect you with internal or external support mechanisms.

●      GP or Health Care Providers: Your doctor or other health professionals can offer guidance on mental health support and connect you to appropriate services if the concerns relate to well-being.

●      Professionals Involved in Yours or Your Families Care: This could include social workers, youth workers, mental health professionals, or any other professional already engaged with your family's needs. They possess existing context and relationships that can facilitate intervention.

●      Local Authorities or Constabulary (Police): These agencies have specialist teams equipped to deal with concerns related to extremism, safeguarding, and community safety. They can provide formal intervention and protection if necessary.

●      Trusted Family and Friends: While not professional services, these individuals can offer crucial emotional support, practical assistance, and an additional perspective during this challenging time. Do not underestimate the power of a supportive network.

The time to act is now.

Seeking support is a sign of strength, not weakness. These professionals are trained to handle sensitive situations with discretion and expertise, ensuring the best possible outcome for all involved.

If you encounter a family clearly going through a difficult time, and you suspect that their child might be becoming involved in or showing support for extremist ideologies or groups, it is crucial that you do not remain passive or indifferent. Turning a blind eye in such a delicate situation is not an option. Instead, you should actively consider extending the vital support they desperately need—a genuine lifeline that can steer them away from a potentially devastating path.

This support is not about judgment or accusation; it is about offering practical help, empathy, and resources. Early intervention is key in preventing an individual from sinking deeper into an extremist mindset.

Here are some thoughtful and constructive ways in which you could genuinely help a family navigate this profound challenge:

●      Offer a non-judgmental listening ear: Sometimes, the most important thing a struggling parent or family member needs is a safe space to talk without fear of condemnation. Listen with empathy to their worries and fears.

●      Share information about available resources: Many organizations and government programs, such as Prevent (in the UK), are specifically designed to offer confidential support to families concerned about radicalization. Provide them with contact details and information on how these services work.

●      Encourage professional help: Gently suggest that they seek advice from professionals, such as teachers, community leaders, faith leaders, or counsellors, who have experience in dealing with challenging behavioural issues and potentially sensitive topics like extremism.

●      Help strengthen family bonds: Extremist groups often target vulnerable individuals who feel isolated or disconnected. Encourage activities and opportunities that strengthen communication and positive relationships within the family unit.

●      Focus on community integration: Isolation fuels extremism. Encourage the family, and the young person if appropriate, to participate in constructive, positive community activities, sports, or volunteering, which can foster a sense of belonging and positive purpose.

●      Maintain confidentiality and respect: Ensure that any support you offer is handled with the utmost discretion. The family needs to trust you to open up, so respecting their privacy is paramount.

●      Be a consistent presence: The journey out of potential extremism can be long and challenging. Offer ongoing, reliable support—not just a one-time conversation—to show them they are not alone.

Sarah - Exit Hate Support Team

Mom of a Former Far-Right Activist