Small Changes Can Make A Big Difference

Having a loved one involved in or supportive of the far-right/extreme right wing can be mentally, physically, and emotionally challenging.

The constant rhetoric, the arguments and debates, the anger, and the tension can be consuming, leaving those close feeling utterly depleted.

Watching those you love become frustrated, cold, and distant with you and feeling powerless whilst your relationship falls apart is a terrifying and heart-wrenching experience.

It is difficult to know what the right thing to do is during these times.

Fear and sadness can sometimes cloud our judgement.

The need for drastic and immediate change and our desire to get our loved one back again can prevent us from looking at the wider picture. However, expecting sudden, complete transformation is often unrealistic.

Real, lasting progress in deradicalisation and disengagement usually happens incrementally, where small changes represent huge milestones.

Why Small Changes - Are Big Steps Forward

When someone is deeply involved in extremist ideologies, their entire identity, social circle, and daily routine revolve around that world. Stepping away or questioning these beliefs is daunting and requires immense personal courage.

What might seem like a minor adjustment to an outsider is often a monumental effort for the individual.

Significant indicators of progress include:

●      Reducing Online Screen Time: Stepping away from online platforms, extremist forums, or toxic social media groups—even for short periods—breaks the cycle of continuous indoctrination.

●      Engaging in Safe Topics: Choosing to talk about everyday subjects like TV shows, hobbies, or shared memories instead of political rhetoric or hostile debates.

●      Participating in Shared Activities: Agreeing to join family activities for just an hour, such as going for a walk, cooking, playing sports, or exercising at the gym, helps reconnect them to positive, real-world interactions.

●      Pausing Before Reacting: Showing restraint during heated moments rather than immediately resorting to angry outbursts or extremist talking points.

The Positive Impact on Home Life and Families

These incremental steps have a cumulative, transformative effect on household dynamics. As the individual slowly lowers their guard, the pervasive atmosphere of fear and hostility begins to dissipate.

●      Rebuilding Trust and Communication: Consistent, low-pressure interactions demonstrate to the individual that they are valued for who they are outside of the ideology, rebuilding trust between family members.

●      Reducing Tension and Stress: Fewer arguments create a calmer environment, giving parents, partners, and siblings much-needed relief from emotional exhaustion.

●      Restoring Stability: Focusing on small, positive shifts gives families a sense of hope and direction, proving that recovery and reconciliation are achievable over time.

By recognising, encouraging, and celebrating these small achievements, families provide the safe foundation needed for their loved ones to fully reject hate, heal relationships, and rebuild a positive future.

It can be a long journey, but every step forward, is one more away from extremist influence.

Sarah

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